Surviving high school isn’t just about passing tests and showing up on time, it’s about navigating the unspoken rules that no teacher will ever warn you about. From hallway horrors to hygiene expectations, these sacred social codes aren’t written in any handbook. Ignore them at your own expense, your social life may depend on it.

First I want to say congratulations. If you are currently reading this then that means you have survived yet another day in the chaotic environment we call school. That alone I feel deserves an award, or at least a free nap period we will never get. Yet, despite the chaos and monstrosity, there is a secret set of unspoken rules not enforced by staff, yet socially expected. While no, they are not written in the student handbook, and ignoring them only leads to your own demise. Fortunately, I have compiled a select few to enlighten you with. That is if you are planning to survive high school without risking your social reputation. 

I get it, mornings are hard. Your alarm goes blaring at the buttcrack of dawn, then snooze, maybe even snooze again just for the fun of it, and now you have precisely 15 minutes to make yourself look like a functional human being. 

Here’s the thing though, deodorant is simply not a suggestion, it’s not even optional, it’s practically considered a public service. Stafford High School student Sophia Cannon strongly worded her opinion on this, saying, “They need to put on some damn deodorant. When I am walking through the hallway I shouldn’t get a giant whiff of sweat and a Wendy’s Baconator.” That about sums up the rest of the student population’s thoughts on the matter. If you disagree, maybe think about grabbing a stick of old spice on your way out the door. Some word of advice, spraying a copious amount of an axe can will not be your remedy. 

Now I want you to picture this, you are utterly late to class, dodging backpacks left and right, and that one PDA obsessed couple is blocking you on your maze to class. Their love simply cannot wait for lunch. Just when things can’t get worse, you encounter the slow walkers. I honestly am not sure what kind of society these students are a part of, but they seem to hold the belief that hallways are somehow a grand hiking trail. This is not the runway, I am simply trying to get to my science class before the degrading sound we call a bell starts ringing in my ears without obtaining a tardy for the third time this week. “People have places to be and walking 0.5 miles an hour just won’t cut it,” stated a very passionate Stafford High School student, Gabriela Egejuru. I’ll put it in simple terms for you, if you are a slow walker, for the love of everything just step aside, let us continue our pathway to misery (or class as administration likes to call it) in peace. 

This may be the oldest and potentially most sacred rule in the books. Forget all the constitution crap your history goes on and on about. The real law of the land is you don’t snitch. Not ever. You look over your shoulder and see someone cheating on your class’s obnoxious 75 question test? No you didn’t. It’s honestly as simple as that. Once you snitch, it’s time to call it quits. Morality has been thrown out of the window with this one. No matter if you think you are right or wrong, you are now in a position of no recovery. Consider your social status diminished, completely obliterated.